Reality Bites......

sorry for the lack of post. not because of lack of ideas but been too occupied with other more important things in hand. i just have to juggle everything in one go, no questions asked. well, reality of life. things aren't always be the way we wanted. sometimes, we just have to settle with whatever we have and in the same time hope for the miracles to happen, who knows...

watch for the updates.....

True Blue...

"We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves in order to be like other people" -
Arthur Schopenhauer


Be yourself...

The Vital One...

Sometimes, when the time comes, we have to make choices. choices that determine the next course of our future. choices that we made usually doesn't really meant to please anyone but ourselves. maybe it sounds selfish, but tell me how many times did we succeeded in life by making choices on the benefits of others? you decide...

hoping for miracle.....

Feast Of Sacrifice.....

Welcome to a month of December. it's the last month of the year 2008 and soon enough 2009 will open its door. yesterday, we organized Doa Selamat at home, a thanksgiving prayer for our family plus to celebrate Aidil Adha which falls yesterday. i also had a chance to fulfill my wish to do the qurban yesterday morning. something that i've been hoping to do for so long. Alhamdulillah, even there were some hiccups earlier but everything was fine in the end. there are few lessons to learn from the experience, but let it be for myself to keep. As long as we are sincere with whatever we do, things will work out just fine, Insya Allah...

Praise to the ONE.....

Tomoko's Wedding Day...

Congratulations to Dk Umi@tomoko & Fakhrul on their wedding day today. may your life be blessed always and have an everlasting happiness :)

Rainy Days...

life is unpredictable, the minute we felt comfortable and just felt like we want to put our feet on the ground, somethings will happen to change it. nothing is for sure anymore. like what i used to say, fate always has a way to intervene in human best laid plans. this things is inevitable, something that we could never prevent. the only thing that we could do is have faith. changes are not always bad, sometimes it helps us to see the the other side of life that we refuse to see. it could also be a wake up call for us. some things happen for a reason, that i agree. we just hope and pray, good things will come for us. if we only just believe...

Tawakkal...

There's No Place Like Home.....

Welcome to the month of November. i haven't had a chance to update anything here. been busy commuting back and forth from bsb to the oil town. last week was not really a good week for me. FYI, i was asked to transfer to Seria without giving any options if i wanna go or not and we were just informed 2 days before, how convenient is that? aih,i miss the old times...

If only...

Option For The Lonely.....

Happy 18th Birthday to my brother, Boy which falls on the 19th October. Welcome to the club, you have become one of us..hehehe

Finding Reasons Part II...

I believe in fate. fate could bring any two or more people joined together in a way that we could never imagine. we could never thought it could happen to us but suddenly, out of nowhere it did, laid just in front of us. there's always a reason behind all this, a reason that only up to us to search for the truth, and nobody else will.....

Its all about you and me...

Where It Hurts......

"Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content" - Helen Keller

Anger was never been the choice...

Eid Mubarak......

Welcome to the month of October, the tenth month in the calendar. i would also like to wish all Muslim readers Selamat Hari Raya. i haven't update anything since last week of September, not even on my dad's birthday. not that i did it on purpose but i just (shamely) forget about it. furthermore, we've been busy with the preparation for Raya plus as the usual workloads. that's why i've been looking forward for the Raya holiday not just to celebrate but to get away for the hectic schedule, just taking some time off from things. frankly, it felt good being away from work once in a while, hehe...

Enjoy it while you still can.....

Where's My Raya Fever..?

it's less than a week to Raya and i just can't seem to find my usual "Raya fever" like what i used to have past few years. i don't know, maybe it's because of the workloads that i have to endure (not that i didn't like it) or maybe also because of the age factor. i haven't bought anything yet, and that do worries me. maybe i have to listens to more Raya songs to get me the 'fever' that i'm looking for..:)

The Apple Of Our Eyes.....

Meet Mohd Aiman Mateen, the newest member in the family :)

Sixteen Candles...

Happy Birthday to my sister, Trish which falls today. May all your wishes came true and your life be blessed always. we just can't wait for the latest addition in the family which is coming quite soon..:)

Sungkai With The Stars..

pictures taken yesterday from ASC's team sungkai gathering at Rizqun Coffee House, The Mall. Special thanks to our boss for the treat.

Happy Bday NiNe.....

A big Thank You's for all the birthday wishes that's be showering me since the early tuesday morning. i had never expect that i'll get a lot this year, since i've been missing in actions for almost a year but this is one thing that i will always remember. like a friend once said, everybody is a somebody to someone...

Say hello to the sunny days.....

Thankful To The One.....

i believe in second chances. i believe, if we failed and the door closing in on us and just when we thought life is over, there's an open door awaiting for us somewhere, usually at the unexpected places. life won't always be smooth sailing, we'll face a numerous rough seas and big waves ahead of us but that's what life is all about, like a roller coaster. it doesn't matter if we failed the first time, the good thing is we could learn from the mistakes and make ourselves a better person...


Happy Birthday.....

A Holy Month.....

Welcome to a month of September. it's always been one of my favorite month, one reason, my birthday of course :), plus this year the month of Ramadhan falls in September, so in other words, i'll be celebrating it in a puasa month. btw, Selamat Menyambut Bulan Ramadhan for all muslims. i actually wanted to post something earlier but unfortunately, there's a problem with our connection at home and what upsets me is that the service provider don't even bother to come and checked it for us but instead ask us to check if ourselves, like we know what's the problem that caused it, shame.. just hope it'll be ok soon so that i don't have to go cyber-hopping just to check my email next time...

Happiness is a long term investment.....

Taking One Step.....

"..Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.." ~Mark Twain~

there's a lesson to learn everyday. it's not in a book, but from everything that surrounds us. sometimes, it's okay to run or hide, if one of the reason we do so is to find our true self.....


I'm back...

Finding Reasons.....

there's always a reason for everything. the reason why or how, out of the sudden we act on our intuition and impulse rather that rational thinking. a reason when, suddenly we vanished, disappear and just leave our trails behind. hoping someone or something will eventually came to find us. not physically, but more to emotional needs. sometimes, its better to run and be alone than to appear in the crowds but get hurt again and again in end...

This is where i stand.....

The Crystal Shoes.....

My latest addition, will buy few more soon. now i'm addicted to 3D puzzles :)

In Our Hands....

life is about making choices. sometimes, some people even try to make the decisions for us, which quite frankly i don't enjoy. whatever decisions that we make, let it be big or small, its up to us to decide, cos at the end of the day, we are the ones who have to live with watever choices we make.....

We are who we are.....

Selfish Is A Word..

what will we do for someone we love,or cared so much for? not just in good times, but in bad times too? do anyone of us are willing to sacrifice what we have or just a little bit of our time for them? some people are willing to go all the way just for their beloved, but for some, sacrificing was never in the dictionary. it has to be 'me' 1st then its 'you', true is it? i've seen all this in the reality. i can't never see myself as the 'me' type of person, frankly speaking. i could never be that selfish, just to leave things as where they were then pretend nothing has happened.unless there's a reason to do so, then maybe i might take those step. hmm..how does it feel like being so self-centred..?

August It Is...

welcome to the month of August. well, it's already 12th of Aug which in other words, i haven't update or post anything for the last 12 days. FYI, i've just recovered from fever which lasted for 2 weeks. Alhamdullilah, i'm getting better, just left the cough which made me experienced sleepless nights for days now. i just hope i get better soon. Insya Allah...


To be or not to be.....

One Of Those Days...

"Our thoughts take the wildest flight; even at the moment when they should arrange themselves in thoughtful order" - Lord Byron

Soul Searching.....

for the last few months(or maybe, almost a year), i've been missing from the crowds. most people have been wondering where i've been. sometimes, i got a call or a text from a few of my friends asking me what have i been doing since. as usual, the most typical answer that i could gave is that i'm very busy with the usual hectic schedule. well, that's partly true. part of it, has got to do with my 'soul searching' mission. i just want to spend a little bit my time with my own self cos i know i haven't done so for the last few months (or years perhaps). lets just say what i experience now is a break. away from the crowds and from everything except for work and my family. i need to lay low for a while, to held back everything yet try to enjoy life as it is. i know, someday i have to 'resurface' again to the crowds, maybe not that soon...

In The Eye Of The Beholder....

"You don't love a woman because she is beautiful; she is beautiful because you love her." ~Anonymous~

Greetings For Lady Boss...

Happy Birthday to my ex-TL plus mentor, Hjh Saf (far right on the pic) which falls today...

Three Of A Kind....

sorry for the lack of post. it has been a hectic and busy life all the way. the pictures are taken on family dinner to celebrate my grandpa's and my nephew's birthday last thursday.

The 2nd Quarter...

welcome to month of July. in my line of work, usually they called it a 2nd quarter. they will be a lot more work to be done plus targets that needs to be achieve. i don't really have anything to blog at the moment, felt very tired lately and lack of sleep. there's a lot of things in my mind at the moment, just can't find a word to express it. maybe soon...

Sepi The Movie

just came back from the Mall after watching 'Sepi'. a nice movie to watch with your loved ones or just anyone. its a story about 3 strangers who are linked together by an accident and it transform their lives forever. a must see movie :)

All The Small Things.....

yesterday, after having lunch with a friend of mine somewhere in sengkurong, i dropped by at one of the dept store across it to buy something before i went back to the office. as i was paying my stuff at the counter, i can't help but to notice an elderly couple walking past me, the husband was holding her hand and asking her to sit at the bench outside the shop. maybe the wife felt tired or unwell cos from the expression on his face he was really worried. i could hear workers at the store whispering to each other saying how sweet it was and it was very rare to see something like it nowdays and i couldn't help but to smile and agreed with them. a love was built to last. it does not judge, nor hate but to care and to accept someone for who they are. in reality, we were so busy to caught a bigger things in life yet we tend to forget those smaller things yet meaningful. we forgot to share and be happy with the people that we loved most.....

A Beautiful Sunday.....

a picnic with my siblings, mom and my sister's best friend at Meragang Beach...

Banner 17...Celtics Rule..!

The Boston Celtics ended their 22-year championship drought by winning the NBA Championship Title, beating L.A Lakers 131-92 in Game 6 of NBA Finals at home on Tuesday night, June 17th. its their 17th title but the first since 1986. a remarkable story from the beginning...

Selamat Pengantin Baru...

It's not too late to congratulates Hj Rudy & Erda on their wedding day which held last sunday, june 15th..

Night Of The Golden Stars.....

Last saturday, it's SCB's Staff Annual Dinner which is held at Polo Club, Jerudong. my sister was also there since she's also an SCB staff. our ASC's team won 2nd place in performance competition that night, thanks to a great effort and hard work from all my colleagues who's participating(our theme is impersonating singers, that is Beyonce and Michael Jackson, so you can guess who is who from the pics..)
it was a fun night, and all of us were having a great time. we do hope we'll be coming back again next year. hmm..looking forward...:)

Catch My Breath....

i'm back! after a week long packed-till-i-can't-breathe schedule, it's finally over. i know i'm gonna miss those excitement i've experienced last week, but at least now i had a chance to have a little rest, relax and unwind...

p.s. there would be a photo blog for the time being, since i've been taking some pictures for some of the events i've attended last week. but i try my best to blog again as usual, probably in few days time...

It Only Came Once.....

sorry for my lack of post plus my 'disappearance' recently. i miss going for handball like what i always did plus other stuff too. truth is, i've been extremely busy. believe it or not, but it's true. so many things has happen for the last two weeks. Alhamdulillah, i was promoted to replace my previous TL aka my mentor who was also promoted and assigned to work at other department. honestly, it was unexpected. never occur in my mind to be chosen. maybe we could mix it with hard work plus a dose of luck, i guess. it's a good opportunity, so i just grab this chance cos i know it will never came twice. so to make things smooth, i have to learned a lot of things and as till now, there are still a lot that needs to be done. i mean, a LOT, really and i know it would take me some time to really settle in this environment plus the changes that occurs around me. the only thing i could do right now is to take things slowly, one day at a time. well, everyday in our life is a learning process, rite..?

It Takes Two...

Congratulations to Hj Rudy & Erda on their 'Nikah' ceremony which took place at Jame'Asr Mosque today.

When a door close.....

things happen for a reason. just when we thought our life is over, when actually it's just the beginning for something new.....

another door opens......

Hectic Days Of The Week.....

it's been a week since i post something here. i know, it was unusual of me to do that but life's been pretty hectic lately. with roadshows and other stuff, really makes me occupied for the whole week. even last night, we were attending Team building dinner just for our dept. it was fun, but too bad people left early so i didn't really get a chance to dance till the end, sigh. i try to update my blog as often as i can next time. there's so many things to say but just couldn't find a word to express it.....

She's Ain't Heavy.....

lately i've been gaining weight. yes, I DO! anyone who saw me will keep saying the same thing. i know, it's not like me but honestly that's just one minor thing that i have to focus on at the moment. like what i used to say to anyone who asked, i'm just having a good life so might just enjoy it while i can. i really have less time to exercise lately, with work and other stuff that's been occupying my always busy schedule ;) Insya Allah, i will try to get back to my usual form soon.....but it won't be that soon :p

Love, Unconditional.....

" I've decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.."
- Martin Luther King Jr

If Only It Stays.....

these days, nothing seems certain anymore. when we thought it will stays the same, at the end it will lead to frustation. what makes it worse it that we can't do anything about it. oh well, i just try to live each day as it is. hoping more good things will come my way.....

3D Easy Assembly......

My latest addiction. it can be found in a Cadbury's Zip 6 in 1 packet :)

Where The Heart Is.....

"i take the risk to love you, to be with you in any way i could be. i can't promise the future, i could only give you now. if only life was fair, at least we don't have to choose..."

tears ran down her cheek, if only she could froze the time so this moment won't pass her by. making a right choice is the hardest anyone could do but sometimes, it's worth to follow what your heart tells you to do.....

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day for all mothers, mummy's, babu's and etc out there. you're our angel, who always put us on the centre of your attention. love you with all our hearts :)

Stars In The Sky.....

"There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness" - Carl Jung

our heart goes out to a friend, far, who lost her beloved grandma who passed away yesterday. as she is also related to my father, i straight away inform my parents as soon as i got the news yesterday morning. just stay strong and be tough through this troubled times ayte...

Al-Fatihah.....

Foolish.....

have any one of you ever encounter any office politics in your workplace? a hypocrites, backstabbing assholes, as cunning as they could be just to make themselves being notice. sometimes they're willing to do anything just to be praise. it's sickening, don't you think so?

Disturbed minds do think alike.....

May It Is.....

welcome to the month of May. i predict it would be a long month and a hectic one for me, as usual. it's a start of a new month on the calendar and for us too cos for someone who is working under sales, every month is a new month for each of us.i haven't had any chance to take a short break or a day off since last month, but maybe i'll be taking a short trip to KL this month, Insya Allah. at least just to relax and unwind :) oh yea, congrats to one of our colleague, Dilla who gave birth to a healthy baby boy early this morning. well with the birth of few newborns today, our population increases by 1%..apakan??..hahaha.....

Made It Complete.....

"To laugh often and love much... to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to give one's self... this is to have succeeded." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To Have And To Hold.....

Happy 34th anniversary for my parents on their marriage which falls today...

A Menace To Society.....

In my usual busy morning, i got a surprise call from a friend of mine. she was crying and told me somebody posted her phone number in the internet saying she offer a 'good service' for anyone who called. how irresponsible and shameful it was for who ever involved. i asked her to get all the necessary evidence and make a report to the authority, better to bring whoever responsible to justice.

what's wrong with our people these days? sigh...

Felt Like Yesterday.....

there were times when it felt like the clock just stop ticking and all things just stand still, unmoved. and how suddenly memories reappears, one by one without us asking for it.....

Being Grateful.....

always be grateful for whatever chances that was given to us. sometimes, it was never comes easy. some people, wasted their chance for something that's not worth holding on. we have to get the facts right not just simply by relying from our emotions, one bad mistake could cost us a lifetime of misery and disappointments. sometimes we thought we knew it all but if we just realise how wrong we could be.....


change for something better, not worse...

As Is Where Is.....

"There are two primary choices in life; to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.." - Denis Waitley

Resurfaced.....

sorry for the lack of posts. i've been busy with stuff and mostly my workloads. plus i've just came back from a trip to kk with my 2 sisters last week. i took a few days off from work and just try to enjoy a little time away from everything. i know i ever said to someone that i won't disappear again but i think i couldn't hold on to the promise just yet. some things haven't settle, sorry for that but i try my best to rearrange everything and try to be back again. there's a lot of things that i want to post here but still trying to find a word to express it. maybe in a few days time i could find something that will inspire me.....

finding a word to say....

When a door opens.....

there are certain things thats worth holding on, worth risking our life for or just by any chance, losing our pride. its easy to build up a wall just to protect our heart from the word broken but sometimes, its more worst when we dont even want to try. a shadow of the past will always cast upon us, but if we try hard enough, sooner or later those shadows will fade away.....

just keep trying.....

Sis, It's Your Birthday...

Happy birthday to my youngest sister, yaza on her 25th birthday today. hope you have a great life ahead of you, less temper and may all you wish come true. oh yea, congrats for becoming one of us :

April's Fools......

welcome to the month of April. there will be a lot of birthday celebrants this month plus anniversaries. how fast time flies, a lot of things has change in just a short period of time. i'm still adapting to the new changes but i just take things slowly, a day at a time...

If You Just Realize.....

"Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives" - Sidney Madwed

Love's Not There Anymore.....

when a relationship ended, both parties should have the last say on everything. sometimes, some of them would even consider giving it another try. unless there's options left and if it's not then maybe it's time to say goodbye. but for some, letting go was never an option. they are willing to go an extra mile to save their relationship rather than to just say goodbye. some even willing to endure a great deal of physical pain thus it could make them emotionally unstable. i know, some things are not as easy as it seems. there's more to it than what meets the eye. i know it's hard to let go, cos i've been there myself. it was never easy to say 'its over'. life was never being fair. when they stop loving us and it was so hard to bear, maybe its good to just pack up and leave....

Six Degrees.....

did it ever occur to us how small the world can be? or how connected we are from each other even when they live far away from us? or how long has it been since we ever saw them? anyone is connected to someone, in some way or another. either its their long lost relatives, an old friend or foes, an ex-lover or a so-called 'crush', colleagues or team mates or whatever it is, there's a connection in there thru anyone of us. when we dig deep or even just by saying one word or a name, the chances or possibility of them being known are high. well, of course there were times when the chances are rare but in the end there would be something else that could connect them to anyone of us. it happens, and i don't think it only happened to me. everyone have their own six degrees somehow.....

the stakes are high.....

Of all people.....

for anyone who knew me, knows very well how i felt about taking a certain amount of risk when it comes to love. i used to give advise to anyone that when you like a person make sure that we tell them how we felt. but honestly, i didn't applied it to myself. i know, shame on me for not 'walking the talk' but as a commitment phobic myself, its not something that i really enjoy doing. but somehow, something happen and change how i look at things and it does turn my life around. for a first time after a very long time of avoiding the issue, i finally decide to take the risk and honestly, it's something that's worth it. at first i thought that i'm making a wrong move but at the end of the day, it is something that i should have been doing for a long time. but mind you, i'm not into the commitment thingy just yet cos at the moment i'm just trying to take things a day at a time. thanks to a certain someone, i finally making a giant leap forward....

catch you when you fall, time after time...

Love is...

"Love withers with predictability; its very essence is surprise and amazement. To make love a prisoner of the mundane is to take its passion and lose it forever.."
- Leo Buscaglia

It's The Holiday......

Selamat Menyambut Maulidur Rasul for all muslim readers and anyone out there and happy holiday for students too. it's a public holiday and a start of first school holiday break. i'm not so sure how many days it is though since i left school for so many years now and i don't even bother to ask my brothers, my bad haha..anyway, hope everyone enjoy it as much as i do:)

Tagged!

Here are two simple rules:
1) Copy and then Answer the questions, if you're tagged
2) Tag other blogger buddies! (as many as you want)

Tell me your real name
Suryana Bte Hj Emran

Your nickname(s)
ant, yana, anna, yan, she(thx to hjh saf!), sur(yea, sad but true!)

Most weird name you were called
Suri, SHE(for anyone working at my dept would know bout it)

How about the most annoying?
suri(what makes it annoying is how the person pronounce it, arghh)

Your sex
Female

Your sexuality
hmm..how do i explain..

Your Birthdate
sept 9th

Your sign
the Virgin :p

Your current location
home sweet home :)

Tell us about your lineage
malay, chinese, indian, one-third each!

Your ethinicity
malay saja lah! lol

Are you single/taken/attached/not available/available/married
single but not available, haha..

Highschool/College/University/Working?
working

What subjects or course are you taking?
maths and public relations

What's your occupation?
counting for people how much debt they should pay every month..

Do you drive?
yea

Legally or illegally?
Legally, although recently i just found out i forgot to renew my license for a year! a bad combination of memory loss and an all year long hectic schedule..

Do you smoke?
once upon a time...

What is/are your fear(s)?
losing faith,having a mental block or being financially unstable..

Honestly, do you think your attractive?
i never thought i didn't...

Smart?
hmm...well, yea!

Funny?
maybe..

What is/are your most over-used expressions?
can't think of any, ada kan?

What about your most over-used pose?
look at my pics then you decide..

Would you date someone ten years younger or older?
older? yea,maybe. younger? no further comment...

Best physical asset(s) of the opposite sex?
their toys, esp cars or gadgets

Best non-physical asset(s) of the opposite sex?
trustworthy, and respecting the opposite sex

Best physical and non-physical asset YOU think you have?
physical? someone dear ever said its my 'smiling eyes',non-physical? the ability to make people laugh in a bad day :)

Okay! DONE! Now list out the people you want to tag! - let em' know if you want them to answer
craven
cyrus 288

Nothing But The Ordinary......

people always want something they can't have. some even go to the extreme just to get it without thinking of the consequences but little did people realise is how they often took things for granted after their wishes are fulfilled. maybe for some, the idea of those things stays forever cemented in their mind. their loved ones will always be there even how cruel they might be. people often crave for those finer things in life without making any effort to appreciate what's in front of them while they could. some people are selfish, aren't they..?

My Pride Is All I Have.....

Ego - "An inflated feeling of pride in your superiority to others"

Ego. it's not that hard to define this word cos i know everyone have their own. High or low it is depends on how we manage it. Some people keep their ego high so that no one would ever mess with it, or maybe we could called that an arrogance or maybe a personal pride. Most people would do anything to protect it and willing to stand up for it but deep down, little that we knew that’s just one way not to show how fragile they were inside. sometimes we could see those facts especially when their ego was bruised. Correct me if I’m wrong but based on what I saw and experienced myself, this facts are true. a person with an ego usually keep blaming everybody than themselves, even if it's clearly stated that everything was entirely their fault. maybe it's not my place to judge cos i even have my own but sometimes when you meet those people with that kind of egocentric style you just can't help but wonder...

Missing in action.....

sorry for the lack of post. i've been so very busy for the last few weeks, all work and no play makes me felt so stress out. i don't even go online for weeks now, which made a lot of people wonder and keep asking me where have i been for the last few weeks. some even text me and asked me if i was going somewhere or if everything was okay. i am okay btw, it's just with a lot of things that needs to be taken care of just took away those leisure moments that i used to have before.lucky i don't have to work this weekend, so at least i could have a bit of time to relax and unwind...

taking it a day at a time....

Tell me it's real......

so many things has change in just a short period of time.when you thought it will never end or will everything stays the same, in just seconds it turn to be something that was way too unexpected to handle. once in a while, i still ask myself if those things are real and not just some dream. it is real. what i need to do now is just sit back and appreciate what's there in front of me.....

the one thing i want the most....

Live each day.....

"If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.." - Chinese Proverb

Finding joy...

every people deserved a chance to find happiness in their own ways. in whatever form it may be, it's up to them to decide but let it be something good and useful. mind you, nobody can stay in grief and sorrow as long as they live. we need to put a smile in our face or laugh as hard as we could. find a reason, get a chance and just enjoy life while we still can :)


Happiness at the least expected places...

A passing thought...

sometimes, when you thought you're getting over something and partly trying to let go, there will be things that make you stop and realize, it was something worth holding on to...

Wishful Thinking.....

Love is such a beautiful thing. We see it everyday in everywhere we go. I know sometimes, life can be bad, messed up and some people can felt unjustified by it. But deep down, how cynical a human can be, at the end they could give in to the temptation of wanting to be in love, or wishing to be in one. It gave you a feeling so powerful, any man couldn’t even comprehend or put it in words. sometimes, it's already at the palm of our hand but we just let it slip away. cause of it? uncertainty on something that's not visible for our eyes to see, can't touch but just felt it and the worst thing that could happen, we just left it unspoken. not all people have the courage to say out loud anything that we felt in our heart. that's what makes human special. not all of them are the same, some are brave enough to take those chances and walk out with a head held high but some are just trying to find the courage to live each day and contemplating and asking themselves the question of 'What If'. what if things were different? what if fate doesn't made us meet rather than putting us in such a complicated situations? the questions will always lingers in our head until at one point we wouldn't be able to take it anymore. the actions that we take will determine the course of our future, either good or bad, it lays in us...

A Comeback Season.....

welcome to the month of March, the third month in the calendar. a lot of things has happen last month and i do hope things would go well also this month and months ahead. sorry for the lack of post, just need a little space on my own plus i'm short of ideas what to post. last week was also one of my busiest week. even my siblings ask me how come they didn't see me online for a long time, never thought anyone would notice though :)

today, SCB participate in a netball tourney organised by HSBC. we came third place in team B, not bad for us who didn't really have a lot of time to practice. B-Mobile team won the game, followed by Runner-up BIBD and HSBC, the current favorite. it was an unexpected win but i think B-Mobile team deserved it. i met a lot of my friends there, fellow players. it made me miss those 'netball session at MOD' that i left behind months ago.maybe for some people they won't understand what i'm talking about here cos there's only a few who knew about it. maybe it's time for a comeback, it's been a while since but now i felt like i'm ready to face everything again.....

A cloudy day...

my condolence goes out to my bro in law, jimmy on the demise of her beloved sister last tuesday night. it came as a shock for us and the relatives as well, even i was speechless when i got the news. my sister was deeply sadden by the loss since they were quite close. there will be tahlil again tonight after maghrib prayer. my thoughts and prayer goes out to the family. AL-FATIHAH..

unpredictable happens.....

life are unpredictable. no matter how well we planned, sometimes there would be something that can change the course of our direction. like a friend once said, expect the unexpected. good or bad it is, we really have to be prepared for any outcome or events that could or will happen...

Happy National Day

Happy 24th National Day for all Bruneians. this year's theme is Tunas Bangsa. i'm not really that patriotic, but i'm proud to be a Bruneian :)

Truth hurts.....

'The truth is painful. deep down nobody wants to hear it, especially when it hits close to home. sometimes we tell the truth because its all we have to give. sometimes we tell the truth because we need to say it out loud to really hear it for ourselves and sometimes we tell them because we owe them, at least that much..' - Meredith Grey

Losing it...

i haven't post anything in days. lack of inspiration i guess or maybe there's just too many things happen last week that i just can't comprehend or put it in words. will try to post something soon..

Happy Lover's Day.....

"The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart." - Helen Keller

Say to me something silly...

This week is a start of the busiest time in my calendar. everything is in full force now, with a lot of tasks that needs to be done, plus with all my sports activities. we are invited to join HSBC's Netball Tournament which is on 2nd March so we've been training hard since plus there's also handball, it's was tiring but i had a lot of fun. at least it gave me a distraction from a lot of things that's been going on lately. also last night, i had a chance to gather with my 3 sisters and we had lot to talk about plus making jokes on those silly things. it's been a while since we had a chance to see each other, kinda miss it sometimes. oh yea, for lover's out there Happy Valentine's Day. i never celebrate it though just felt like wishing it that's all haha..

Those little things that matters.....

Foolish...

just when you thought you knew everything about a person, in some point or another something will happen just to prove that there are things that our eyes can't see, or we just left behind. people make choices everyday, either good or bad its up to them to decide. one foolish mistake could cause us years of regret. well, its up to us to think what's best as long as we are not solely blinded for something superficial, something fake...

the ball is in your court......

Walking Wounded

it had been an unusual week for me. a lot has happen and i was feeling drained emotionally. not having a usual good night sleep, i kept waking up in the middle of the night and it could lead me to think of something unnecessary. lucky i have sport activities to fill up my day plus handball resume training again starts yesterday. it was a nice game but unfortunately i hurt my right arm again, it was so painful i can't hardly lift it up since last night. even this morning, i could only use my left arm to drive to work. i just hope it gets better tomorrow. well, at this moment in time, it felt more better to endure the physical pain that the heartache......

it hurt me as much as it hurts u...

Native state...

" What if man lingered on how things would then fail to move us. The finest thing in life is its uncertainty..." - Kenko

An imperfect tale...

life doesn't made out of fantasy. it doesn't made out of those characters in movies that sometimes we wish to a part of. that's just not how it worked. in real life, a lot of sacrifices need to be made, hurdles need to face plus at times we have to defy all kinds of prejudices in all types of forms. no matter how hard we try to be the person others wish for, sometimes we just have to accept the fact that we can only be who we are and not what they want us to become. sigh, the reality of life.....

shed a light.....

At the wrong side...

i woke up at the wrong side of the bed again today. i'm moody for the whole morning and i've been facing a lot of setbacks from a lot of different things. its too much that i can handle, i better get home early, maybe take a nap for a while. i just hope the feeling will gone soon..

February

welcome to february. the shortest and one of my favorite month of the calendar. hoping more good things to come my way :)

3 In The Morning

its 3.25am and i suddenly woke up from a bad dream. i've been going to bed early lately, felt tired from the hectic schedule for the last few days. i'm looking forward for february actually, don't know why or maybe because of the public holiday. kan cuti sja ani bah:)

If only you knew.....

You Give Me Something.....

James Morrison - You Give Me Something

You only hold me when I sleep
I was meant to tread the water
But now I've gotten in too deep
For every piece of me that wants you
Another piece backs away

'Cos you give me something
That makes me scared, alright
this could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
Cos someday I might know my heart

You only waited up for hours
Just to spend a little time alone with me
Like I say I've never bought you flowers
I can't work out what they mean
Never thought I'd love someone
That was someone else's dream

'Cos you give me something
That makes me scared, alright
And this could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
Cos someday I might call you from my heart
But it might be a second too late
And the words that i could never say
Gonna come out anyway

'Cos you give me something
That makes me scared, alright
And this could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
Cos someday I might know my heart
know my heart, know my heart

One day, a good friend of mine text me early in the morning and asked me to hear this song (she had her own reason for doing so actually (thanks) and i do like the song so i'll post it here. i'm in a mood for some love songs at the moment, sorry for that but just felt like it, hee..

ASC's Night...

The Asc's Team Building dinner last night, at Mabohai Sports Complex.

A little peace of mind....

a lot of my friends keep asking me where had i been for the last few months. they felt like i've been avoiding them, even my best friend felt like i don't want to see her anymore which was so not right. i can't really explain the reason for my mysterious disappearance to everyone, let it be my little secrets. once in a while, people need a time of their own even myself. a lot has been happening and i just can't seem to absorb everything in one go. i know being 'invisible' is not a good option but at the moment that's the only choice i can think of. i know, sooner or later i have to come out from the sanctuary but let it be from my own will to do so.

found my place at the other side of the world.....

Farewell To The Knight...

Heath Ledger was found dead at Tuesday, 22 January 2008 at his Manhattan apartment. he was a great actor and one of my favorite..

A Long Day.....

how amazing it was when a lot of things can filled a course of the day. sometimes it can be something good or an eye opener. something that we never could really thought of. well, we learn something new everyday rite? the only regret was that i was never able to take any actions earlier. maybe i'm just oblivious of such things or just plain ignorant. in my state of mind at the moment, i just can't seem to be sure which is which. who to be blamed or who's faults was it on the first place. one mistake that people used to make is taking things for granted and it could be the habit that they couldn't break. how selfish they can be, or maybe partly could be blamed on me. a friend ever said to me, too much trust can kill you and i think she's right. oh well, the damages has been done. there's nothing left to say. maybe it's true what people say, being good doesn't really pays but being bad does...

Between The Lines...

Can't Fight The Moonlight......

how do you get back and pick up the pieces that you left way back? something that you thought could never be given back to you or you'll never imagine finding it again after a long long time? maybe it's hard to understand what i'm talking about at the moment, even myself still in a process of examining those details everyday. there's a lot of changes happened in my life lately. something unexpected but good. things just fell at the right places and i think at a right time. but why did i still have an urge to fight everything and just pretend it was something superficial?

well, there's a lot of things that were at stake. simply said, maybe everything. tell me i worried too much but yea,i do. sometimes i ask myself, is all this worth the risk, if things are not going well in the end but then at this point, it doesn't seem to matter anymore. i don't wanna fight it, i'm tired of running. run from the fact that its what i want but choose to be ignorant so it won't hurt my pride. it's what i always do. but this time, i just couldn't afford to run anymore.i can't fight the moonlight.....

Mild Fever..

i've been under the weather lately. caught a flu for a few days already and just hope its not getting worse. or maybe feeling a little fatigue. lots of work, less rest which means lack of sleep too. sometimes i could stay late thinking. either its something important or the worst part is all those unnecessary things. oh well, i should take some rest now..

A Family Affair...

a family bbq dinner at my grandparent's house

Angel Of Mine...

The 2 birthday celebrants last night....

Happy Birthday Mum

a very special bday wish for my mum on her birthday today. happy bday mummy, you're my inspiration and my strength thru the years, in my ups and downs. hugs n kisses, love you with all my heart :)

Quote of the day

this quote was sent to my email from lovingyou.com (well, they sent to me daily);

"The one that loves you at your worst is the one that deserves you at your best."
- Jonathan Florendo

quite true eh? what do you think? hmm...

My Sanctuary...

how i spend my sunday....

Lost and Confused...

it seems like my mind don't work out clearly and perfectly well these past few days. don't know why, maybe because there's a lot of things going on. it's hard to swallow everything in just one go thus it made be not being myself. i feel lost out of sudden. maybe i just need a little time to recuperate, to find my way back into the game.

if i could run, anywhere but here.....

Chances Are.....

what chance do we have, when we have so little to give yet nothing to lose? when too many things are at stake, what else can we put as an offer? perhaps nothing. i don't know, it's hard to know for sure. it feels like gambling, putting everything on the table without any knowledge or assurance that either we could win all or end up losing everything? why is it so hard, even what we want is just a chance for happiness?

A New Beginning.....

Selamat Menyambut Tahun Baru Hijrah 1429 for all muslim readers out there including my family and friends. may all of us be bless, Amin :)

A Quiet Wednesday....

taking a minute break, a quiet afternoon in SCB office...

a lesson to learn....

i learned some valuable lessons yesterday. even how careful we planned our life, sometimes fate can intervene and just change the course of it or maybe delay it for a while. i had my share of experience just yesterday. who can believe in just one day we already learned so much about some things that we don’t really pay attention before. It’s not always something big but more of those little ones. Due to my carelessness, I accidentally hit a pole which was purposely put in front of this bike
dealership in gadong to prevent anyone to park their cars there. Lucky for me, it only dent my car a bit and left yellow paint on my front bumper which means I only have to polish it just to remove the paint. Which was supposed to be a quick meeting with the bike dealer became an hour wait at the workshop just to get my car fixed. Aih..silly me…

but a friend once said, even how bad your day started, you’ll get something good out of it at the end or something more meaningful are yet to come. That’s what happen to me, I won’t elaborate much on the details because I think it’s best to keep it sealed and just for myself but lets just say it did make my day better plus I got to learn something new about someone, all the small things but yet precious. I’m not making any sense am I? oh well…still evaluating……

Fight, in the name of something...

how far would we go and fight for something that we felt worth it? are we willing to sacrifice everything that we had and just pursue that one thing in life? i often questioned myself, if one day i was in that shoes will i be able to fight just for the sake of pursuing my own true happiness. will i be brave enough to defy the odds and came out a winner? at the moment, i don't have the answer for that question. honestly, i'm still doing some soul searching at the moment. the last few weeks has been an eye opener. even how observant i am to others, i am ignorant to my own true self. i often said, fight for something if its worth it or show how much we cared but how ashamed, i don't really apply the rules myself. i don't know what stops me from doing so, it's my pride i guess. oh well, shame on me. hmm..maybe one of these days...

Those missing pieces.....

i'm looking for some missing pieces on a perfect puzzles,it's hard to put everything together when all the clues seems to be blurry. feels like the pieces was hid somewhere so no one could ever find it or maybe i just have to look for it at an unusual places...

if only things weren't that complicated.....

A wake up call..

i learned some valuable lessons yesterday, i dont want to elaborate more at the moment, maybe ill do it in my future post but lets just say its more like a wake up call. when things get a little messy, the one thing we should do is try to find the problem and look for the best solution available..

Hello 2008..

Happy New Year 2008 to all readers, my family and friends.2007 brings a lot of memories for me, some bad but above all it got some of sweetest memories and taught me a lot of valuable lessons in life. i just hope 2008 will be one great year, less heartache but more happiness all year long, Insya-Allah.....